Cupidopolis

“My family is so messy. I am simply going out of my mind. Help me please!”

Most of the time, messiness is a result of lack of storage space. If you can organise some storage solutions, you will find that you are half way there. The rest will boil down to be strict and insisting that until they tidy their mess they cannot get dinner / dessert / go out / do something fun etc! You will need to put your foot down but get organised first so that they cannot have any excuse for not tidying up.

“My children want a Puppy for Christmas. The truth is I do not want to be lumbered with looking after another being and I am not sure that they will want the responsibilities that come with Puppies!”

The saying is A Dog is for life and not just for Christmas! Get your kids one of these stickers and explain your thoughts and feelings. Perhaps you can puppy / dog sit a friends dog for a week or two (perhaps when they head off for holidays) and ensure the children do everything that having a dog entails eg feeding, washing, walking and poop cleaning! I think after a couple of weeks, the kids would lose interest unless they are really ready.

An alternative is getting a cyber pet. Places like The Gadget Shop or I want one of those Ltd sell them.

“My son has posters of naked women and who knows what all over his wall. He also has rude Bedroom Door Signs! He is only 14. I do not think it is appropriate behaviour. I have told him to remove them but he refuses saying that it is his room and his space. I feel that he should respect our feelings and take them down. I want to go to his room and rip them down, but my husband says I shouldn’t. I just want to cry. I don’t know what to do!”

Most teenagers have posters on their wall. They tend to have posters of the latest pop groups and singers. You need to see whether these women are completely naked or if they are just skimpily dressed (like most female pop stars!). Your husband and son are right to a certain extent. It is his space but it is your house. You are also right, he needs to respect your feelings.

I know it is not easy, but do try to find some time to actually speak to your son and tell him how you feel. Tell him that it is ok to have pictures of pop groups but not of naked people. Tell him it is ok to have bedroom signs but not offensive ones. It is all about compromise. You both need to compromise and understand how you are each feeling.

“My son is 2 and still is not talking. My neighbours daughter who is just 18 months can say several words. I am worried that he is retarded. Who should I take him to?”

I would like to point out that children progress at different speeds. Some children will have the gift of the gab and others will take some time before they utter their first words. Girls also tend to speak earlier than boys.

Children start by babbling. They are sounds rather than words. If your son is not even doing this, you should take him to your health visitor or GP to have him checked out. This still does not mean that your child is retarded. He could have other issues such as glue ear or perhaps more simply he is a quiet and pensive child. It is not unheard of children taking their time to speak and immediately starting with full sentences.

However do speak to your health visitor to put your mind at rest that all is fine with your son.

“I am a 42 year old man who is single. I have difficulty when it comes to dating. I really try but cannot ask a girl out. I particularly like Russian women but they seem unattainable. It would be really nice to have a relationship. What should I do?”

Sometimes dating can be hard but it is about getting yourself out there onto the market. If you find you have difficulties asking women out directly, you could try a dating site. This eleminates asking out people who are simply not interested and you can date someone with things in common.

Although you might have a penchant for Russian women, you must ask yourself if you like them because they are out of your league (far away / language barrier / unlikely to meet) and so less likely to face rejection. If this is not the case, you will find dating services that can cater to your needs.

I would still recommend dating someone based on friendship and not nationality!

“My boyfriend does not want to use a condom and I don’t want to get pregnant. He says that he will ejaculate outside me and that I cannot get pregnant. My friend said that I still can. Who is right?”

Let me start by saying that it only takes 1 sperm to get you pregnant. Before ejaculation or orgasm occurs there are often sperm at the tip of the penis. So, to answer your question YES you can get pregnant if you do not use a condom even if he ejaculates outside your vagina.

However there are more issues than getting pregnant. You can contract STD’s - Sexually Transmitted Diseases. These can effect your fertility eg Chlamydia to even kill you eg HIV / AIDS.

If you are in a relationship and can be sure that your partner is completely faithful, you can always use alternative methods of protection such as :-

• The Pill
• The Diaphram
• Spermicide
• IUD / Coil
• Implant
• Sterilization

Why not head to your GP or Nurse for some advice on contraceptives that is best suited to your needs? Alternatively, you can purchase online also. (See the link below)

“I never know what to buy my husband. He always buys anything he wants as soon as he wants it. It is his birthday and I am stuck for a gift. Any ideas?”

It is never easy buying a present for a bloke. You could do things which are special but cost nothing. Things such as :-

• Run a bath with bath salts and candles
• A romantic meal again complete with candles and soft music
• Go for a picnic under the stars

Another alternative is to get him a voucher from places like BuyaGift, I Want One Of Those Ltd, Virgin Experience Days or even the Gadgetshop.com.

I have added a few links so you can go direct to the websites. Good Luck!

“My boyfriend occassionally drinks and then hits me. He is always sorry about and I keep forgiving him. But I am scared he will do it again. Don’t tell me to leave him because I love him. How can I get him to stop hitting me?”

I know this is not what you want to hear but he will keep hitting you. He won’t stop. He does not love you because if he did, he would not hit you. You have to leave him. If it happened once, perhaps you could try again but you know it keeps happening. When will you leave him, when you are carried off in a coffin? Or when perhaps you have a baby and they carry your baby off in a coffin?

“I am really hairy and I hate it. I have thought about shaving it all off but heard that I can end up with more hair and very stubbly. I have hair all over my body including my back, my arms and my tummy and it is really upsetting me!”

First of all I would like to reassure you that most women feel far too hairy in our modern western society. We go to all extreems to be hair free. We shave, wax and epilate. Sometimes going afar as laser technology to ensure our hairlessness.

I would first check out with your GP that the hairiness that you currently are experiencing is not hormonal or another issue. With a quick check and perhaps a bloodtest or two, you can be sure you are medically sound.

Then if you still feel uncomfortably hairy, you can always head to your beauty salon and ask their advice. I am sure they will offer you the best course of action to take.

Besides, don’t worry too much about it. You are in the same boat as most other women!