Cupidopolis

“I think my son is a homosexual. His dad would disown him and I am not sure how I feel. How do I deal with it?”.

First of all, until you are sure, there is very little you can do other than broach the subject with your son.

As for your feelings, does it really make a difference to you emotionally about who he physically is attracted to? Assuming he is homosexual, he will need support when he “comes out” and he would really appreciate it if you can support him as his mother. After all a mother’s job is to accept their children no matter what!

As for his father, perhaps you ought to work on softening him up before your son “comes out”. And even if you cannot help his dad change his attitude, being there for your son will be less heartbreaking for him. It already is not easy to be different, let alone having to bear difficulties with both your parents.

Try to not judge him for his sexual preferences but to accept for what he always was and will be -  YOUR SON!

“I am not in love with my boyfriend but I do not want to end up on my own. I do not know what to do. Should I split up? Should I try to find someone first, then break up?”.

It is not fair on your boyfriend to stay with him when you so obviously do not love him. Nor is it fair on yourself. Breaking up is always hard to do but it inevitably should be done for both your sakes.

“My 15 year old daughter wants to go to a concert. At first I said an immediate NO and she retorted that I don’t trust her. This left me thinking. What should I do?”.

First of all, some concerts have minimum age limits and ID may be required.

Secondly, your instincts said to say NO and you are only questioning it because she pushed you. As a teenager, it is her instinct to push you for more. It is a good survival instinct but your motherly instinct is even more important.

I am sure there are many reasons you do not want her to attend, sit her down and explain them to her. It will help build bridges rather than cause further rift.

Remember this is not about trust or lack of but about your daughter’s safety.

In my work I have been shocked by how many people practise unsafe sex. Let me not talk about the psychology of unsafe sex because I can write a book on that rather than a short post. The point about unsafe sex is that it is, simply put - UNSAFE!

Ok so what exactly is unsafe in unsafe sex:-

• The most obvious side effect is - Pregnancy
• The most common side effect are STD’s - Sexually Transmitted Diseases including but not limited to Gonorrhoea, Syphilis, Crabs, HIV etc
• Other effects include infections, lack of peace of mind and even xxx

So what do you need to do to practise safe sex? You can abstain from sex which is the most effective, though I do understand that this is impracticable. The next best thing is to use a condom as this is the most effective way to have safe sex.